I've mentioned this a few times over the last few weeks, but today I'm going deep into Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert.
Last fall I saw that Liz (we are on a first name basis - she doesn't know that, but we are) was putting out a new book. At this point in my life I am living in the world of fictional novels and online articles, so reading a self-help book (which I was drowning in years ago) is a stretch for me. (Trust me. I've read them. Many of them.) Something about this book grabbed my attention. Maybe it was the cover, maybe it was just that my soul said, "This One". I don't know, but I hopped over to Amazon, read the reviews and promptly ordered the darn thing. My soul wasn't finished and it said, "You cannot do this alone". I'm still not sure if that meant I cannot accomplish on my own or maybe that I shouldn't do it alone. Regardless. I received that message as well and invited a whole bunch of women via FB into my sacred circle to create Big Magic in their own lives. I broke the gathering into 8 weeks. They looked like this:
There have been times when I have sat in circles and seen lively discussion and times when I have seen extreme discomfort. For this group - some who knew each other, some new to us all - we had both of those things plus the quiet and reflectiveness that I think has to come with this type of work. Okay, what's Big Magic about and why should you read it? I am a Priestess. There, I said it. I have been to the fire. I have been the initiate. I have been the leader. The point to that is that I have been around the spiritual block (knowing I have SO SO SO much left to learn) and have studied with master teachers and read the books and chanted and done all of those things. If you are looking for THAT book. This is NOT it. This is another book. It is the raw, in your face, practical approach to getting into your creative space and getting out of YOUR OWN WAY! This is the book that doesn't say "let go of your fear" it is the book that ACKNOWLEDGES your fear and knows that it's probably always going to be with you and to get over it. This is the book that tells you how to walk in step with those dark places in a real and often humorous way. This is the book that says, yeah, you might be a tortured soul, but don't live in that space. Honor it and hold it's hand but then keep moving (Liz tells that part of the soul to "get in the back seat, it's days of driving are over"). This book is so much that I cannot even tell you what it is. What I can tell you is it is not a book going to the used bookstore. It's one I recommend to my friends. It's full of "a-ha's". It's, well, Big Magic. A little more on what we did as we worked through Big Magic:
There are so many things you can do around this book to bring Big Magic into your life. What are you waiting for? If you don't read anything else this year, this is it. Not sure? Below are some of my favorite Big Magic quotes:
Not once. Not twice. Not three times. But, FIVE times this week I have literally been stopped in my tracks. It all began on Tuesday. It was my turn to deliver a meal to friends whose daughter was on day 21 in the ICU due to complications from a risky heart surgery. I had arranged the entire day (including the delivery) around my son's schedule. (Note to self: my schedule is now the priority.) He had circus practice at 3:15 (yes, I said circus), a mandatory 8th grade parent meeting at 6:00 (only 1/2 of the parents showed - another note to self) and Scouts at 7:00. In the midst of all of that I had to deliver a meal and find a way to feed myself and the kids. As I left to pick up the Moon and deliver the meal I received a phone call that circus was cancelled. What? I really DESPISE last minute cancellations, especially when it meant we could have eaten at home instead of eating out which was really all we could do that night. After circumnavigating the city with the Moon, picking up the Sun and having dinner, I sat down to bitch to my fellow parent at the meeting and mid-way through the tirade I simply stopped. My conversation went from, "I am so frustrated" to..... "I am SO grateful that I have a car to drive around the city, money to eat out tonight and healthy kids not lying in the hospital." Did I mention my friend is the religious ed director for a large Episcopal church? Her reply was, "It's all a matter of perspective." Amen to that. The week has continued in a similar vein. With on and off snow this week, the children have been home since Wednesday morning, which is when I got the call that a much older cousin's wife had died suddenly. This meant a Thursday afternoon trip to pick up my father and head out on a two hour drive to a rural Tennessee town for a funeral visitation in freezing rain which ended in dinner at Krystal's (see my next post on migraines in case you want to know how that ends). Her name was Pearlee and her daughter and I are close in age and spent time together during the long hot summers of my youth in Lawrence County - what I like to call God's country. Friday morning brought another cold day and the blessed snow that we have all been waiting for. I say blessed because it was a blessing watching my hubby and the kids outside on and off all day playing in the 8-inches that piled up around our home. Normally I would be in the fray but the aforementioned migraine had a different plan for me. Throughout the day, as I counted my blessings - truly for I know that every day brings something new - I watched FB anxiously. Our friend whose daughter was in the ICU was rushed once again to surgery. Did I mention they are our friends that we had lost touch with (or my husband's friends I should say) then reconnected through the joys of adoption and the local Families with Children from China group? As I watched them try to get to the hospital and the updates on their FB page they posted another update about another family. A family who, coincidentally, brought home their daughter on the same plane from China on the same night last September. My friend's daughter came out of surgery alive and well once again. The other family were not so lucky. I had felt all day that something was wrong. The funeral, the snow, my friend's daughter, the migraine...and now this. Seeing a family - who I truthfully do not EVEN know, lose their daughter made the evening long as I paced around, picking up things and putting them down. Trying to clean the kitchen but losing my focus for even that mundane task. Once again this week being stopped in its tracks. And now, today, I once again wake with a migraine. I decided I could lay in bed and suffer or try to work a little and hope that my thoughts come out coherently. A friend posted on her FB page that she believed the snow was good as it has made us all take a break from regular life, rest, reconnect and play. Maybe being stopped in our tracks is a good thing. Maybe we need to put the breaks on more often which gives us the space to count our blessings. “For today and its blessings, I owe the world an attitude of gratitude.” - unknown That was the way the FB post began. It was a few weeks ago when the Syrian refugee crisis seemed at its worst (not that it is any better) that a friend posted an image of refugees and this question. What followed was a lengthy tirade against local churches, the government and more. It was not the first of such posts I had seen from friends about the crisis nor was it the first post such as that I have seen about other issues affecting our world. "Why doesn't somebody do something?" My question to you is this: "Why don't you do something?" A "do-gooder" at heart, I've always wanted to change the world - to "be the change". But, in my do-gooder mind there are some things I have never been able to reconcile. Why do those complaining the loudest do the least amount of work? (Yes, I have seen this in practice.) Why is your child's [fill in the blank] sport more important than filling backpacks full of food for children who are going home to an empty pantry on the weekend? (I promise you, giving your child the experience of feeding the hungry teaches them a helluva lot more than sitting on the bench while waiting their turn baseball.) Why do people crucify the Christians but then look to them in crisis? (If you have followed me for long or know me personally, you know I am not Christian but work with lots of other "do-gooders" who are.) Why do people give $100,000 to an elephant sanctuary or a dog rescue while my friends and I have to beg for money to feed children dying in an overseas orphanage? Someone tell me 'cause I need to know. Today I write this post having sent a heartwrenching letter to a local organization in which I have been a board member for three years. The letter begged for someone else to step up to take the helm. I. AM. DONE. It's not that anyone did anything wrong. It's not that I know longer want to be a part of something so special. But, my focus has shifted to fulfill my work with an organization BEING THE CHANGE and changing lives for orphaned children every day. It's not that I have more time than you to serve. Let me be clear. For everyone sitting and saying "I do not have the time, the energy, the resources, the whatever" the reality is that NO ONE ELSE DOES EITHER! But, we do. When we are passionate about something, we find it within ourselves. For a time I sat on the board of my son's school. The entire time he has been in the elementary grades there I was either a parent volunteer, board member or employee and either as part of a fundraising team or the primary fundraiser can tell you that I took part in or led the raising of over half a million dollars while there. So, for others, it seemed I had all of the time in the world. What some, but not many, knew was I was working two jobs to have my son in that school, we sold and bought a home, my family and I traveled to China for an adoption, my daughter had 6 surgeries in two years plus two years of speech therapy, I lost my mother......I could go on. It seems like I'm angry. I promise. I am not. To continue to serve was and is my choice. It is what my heart and my soul calls me to do. To think of my life without a service component is unimaginable to me. And, to think of not passing that passion on to my children and letting them know that they can change the world is unthinkable. Today, I ask you this - the next time you ask "why doesn't somebody do something" ask yourself these two things: "Why don't i do something?" |
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Meet DanaI’m Dana Croy and I am a modern day mama. Balancing family and work is not always easy (not to mention a little self-care). Though being Mama to two fantastic kiddos is a huge part of my life, that was not always the case. I wear many other hats and invite to sit down and find harmony with me. Archives
August 2021
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